Radiance 25 - Iniquity, Transgression and Sin

Two hours later, the last three of the Seven were standing outside the excavations, watching the last tourists slink through the gates and wander off through the old city. And somewhere, deep under the earth, under rock and stone, lurked the Leviathan, the primordial chaos, waiting to rise and submerge the earth once more.    “You know,” Asher said conversationally, “that we’re about to break into the Western Wall.”
    “Uh-huh,” Virgo said with a nod and a small smile.
    “The holiest site in Judaism.”
    “That’s right,” said Rahko.
    “Just checking,” said Asher. “I suppose we should get on with it. A little cover, perhaps?”
    Virgo nodded, “They all come for violence,” she chanted. “Their hordes advance like the east wind, gather prisoners like sand.”
    As the verse reached its end Asher felt the wind picking up, carrying the sand around the old city like mist. The effect was far from total but it ought to hide their movements from the more casual observer.
    “Damn,” Virgo said, “that verse should have worked better.”
    “I think none of us are quite feeling ourselves,” Rahko said. “Without the Palace to support us, I feel my power waning.”
    “All the more reason to get on with it,” said Asher, “let’s go.”

Radiance 3 - My head is drenched with dew

So we've reached the third chapter of Radiance, in which we meet our second main character - Virgo. 


Do you like the first three chapters? Have they grabbed your attention? Do they do a good job of introducing the characters? What could I have done instead/as well to improve them?


All comments gratefully received!


9th Av 5775

    It was a fitting night to be in Jerusalem.
    Five thousand, seven hundred and five years ago to the day, Roman soldiers had been standing on this very spot, while the blood of Jewish zealots had stained the ground red. The sky turned a shade of crimson as the holy temple, God’s seat on earth, was consumed by flame.
    Still we mourn, thought Virgo, as she hurried through the winding streets of the Old City. But for how much longer?
    It was heavy, hot and dry in Jerusalem, though that was nothing strange in the heart of the summer. Still, there was something unusual in the air, an electricity, a strange sort of energy. In New York, Virgo might have said that a storm was coming - but this was Jerusalem, and the rainy season, if you could really call it that, was still two months away. No, this was something else. This was the reason why Virgo had come, why she had persuaded the Seven to leave Asher where he was and deal with a more imminent situation.
    And so Virgo was in Jerusalem on the ninth of Av, observing the strictures of the fast day, and hunting a creature of the Other Side.